Gentle Reminders

Sometimes after the kiddos and hubby are tucked sweetly into bed, I browse the Internet performing my 'research'. Google is usually my site of choice. I constantly have a never ending stream of questions in my head, and am happy that I can turn to my trusty computer and find answers in a flash.

Last night, water-birth was on the brain. (No, this is not a subtle announcement). We are not expecting. Not yet at least. A blogger that I enjoy reading just had a baby, and she choose to use a midwife and water birth to welcome her baby into the world. I have always been curious, but both of my pregnancies have come with a few medical problems, and home birth was never an option. I think it takes a brave woman to birth at home, but I really like the thought of laboring like my ancestors did; bringing a baby into the world naturally, in the comfort of your own home.

My research started with water-births (which is fascinating) to YouTube videos of water-births (ouch!) to lotus birthing (which is very interesting: it is when you leave the baby attached to the the placenta via the umbilical cord. You wait until the cord detaches; all the while carrying around a rotting placenta. I do not see the point of this, but ... to each his own!) Was that too much info? well, you learn something new everyday!

My research continued, and I noticed another video about a baby, so I clicked and it was a story of a still-birth. It was heartbreaking. Along with that video came others. Stories of women who lost their babies at 20 weeks, 26 weeks, 39 weeks. Each story heartbreaking. There are some things that happen to us in this life that we may never understand. I can't imagine that there is anything more devastating than losing a child.

I thought of my own two girls and how lucky I was to have given birth to them. Then i was able to wrap them up tight and bring them home. And now, I get to care for them. I am blessed to have the opportunity to teach, and love, and cuddle, and play with them. These videos served as a gentle reminder for me to take the time and cherish the moments that I have with my babies. I am so very thankful to be able to experience the joys of motherhood. It's not always easy, but I wouldn't trade one single second.

Wrinkled.

I think that each child SHOULD come into this world with a warning label. A brightly colored label with a bold font that says something to the tune of, 'no matter what you do, this child WILL cause your face to wrinkle! Enjoy!'

I was looking at my reflection in the mirror the other day, and wasn't too pleased to discover that I have my first official deep-set-not-going-away-anytime-soon wrinkle. It resides on my forehead. Front and center. It doesn't appear when I am smiling. No. It appears when I am making that, 'are you listening to mommy' face. Darn kids.

Oh well. I know it's not the first wrinkle that will be courtesy of my children. There will be lots more. Worry wrinkles, tired wrinkles, and lots and lots of happy wrinkles. Motherhood is a journey- that's for sure. Apparently my face is the road map! :)

Post Edit: As soon as I published this post, there was a side bar ad for the "top ten wrinkle creams of all time"- good to know I have the option of a good wrinkle cream someday- for now I will wear my little wrinkle with pride. :) Now gray hair... that will be a different story. Pass me the dye please!

Mom, Md.

Haley hurt herself tonight. She came to sit on my lap for comfort. I hugged her, kissed her cheek, and made it all better. I can make the pain go away... because I am her mommy.

Right now, it seems so easy to make her feel better. A hug will often do. Sometimes I worry about the future. Will it still be just as easy to make her pain go away? Will a hug be enough?

I hope it will be. I know that when my own heart is hurting, I often turn to my mother's arms for comfort. I don't know how or why it works, it just does. Everytime.